A Scale of Sapphire

Evelyn

She didn’t take the bowl, but she didn’t tell me to leave either. I took that as a good sign, cautiously stepping further into the darkened room. Her eyes scanned my features, lingering for a moment on my fiery red hair. I offered her what was meant to be a comforting smile, but as her eyes snapped to my teeth and tension shot through her body, I realized that was a mistake.

“You’re her, aren’t you? The one Matt told me about!” She sounded nervous, afraid even, but nowhere near the panic I would’ve expected. Maybe she was just too tired.

“I am, and I’m so damn sorry for what happened to Maria.” I set the bowl on a nearby dresser, moving slowly, and keeping my hands in view, doing everything in my power to keep her from feeling threatened. “My name is Evelyn, and I’d like the chance to apologize to my son. He doesn’t have to forgive me, he doesn’t ever need to talk to me again, but I want to have this conversation, for both our sakes.”

“You killed his mom.”

“I did, but as I understand it, I’m not the only killer here.”

“That’s different.” She sounded much less afraid, and much more indignant now. A little angry on Matt’s behalf. I was glad. He deserved someone in his corner. “Our emotions were being fucked with. We weren’t in control. Not completely, at least.”

“This might surprise you, but I could say the same.” I smiled again, careful not to show my teeth this time. “I’d just changed from a human ‘man’ to a vampire woman who’d never had a drink in her whole life. I was flooded with predatory instincts, and I was starving. I lashed out, and I’ve regretted it every day since.”

“Then why did you run? If it wasn’t your fault, why did you run away? Why’d you just leave him like that?!?”

“I was scared.” I took another slow step towards her, still taking care to come off as non threatening as possible. “Matt was coming at me with a knife, and I was scared of what I might do to him. I was afraid I’d hurt him, and because once I fed I started to recover my senses, I did the most reasonable thing I thought I could do. I wish I hadn’t, but I did, and no amount of regret will change that.”

She stared at me for a long moment before suddenly rising to her feet. She snatched up the food from the dresser before returning to the bed, patting an empty space beside her. She still seemed nervous, but this was progress.

“He’s spent the last few months hating you, y’know? He wanted to hunt you down and kill you, and I wanted to help him.”

“And now?”

“Now I just wanna be safe. I want him to be safe, too.” She popped a blueberry in her mouth, chewing thoughtfully before she continued. “I don’t know you… I don’t know you, I still don’t know if I trust you, and I have no idea how Matt will react when he finds out you're here, but… I think talking to you would do him some good.”

I shot her a broad smile, forgetting momentarily to hide my teeth. Fortunately, she seemed much less disturbed about it this time.

“Maybe not today though.” She smiled back at me. A gentle grin as she tried to temper my eagerness. “There are only so many revelations you can squeeze into one day, y’know? Learning you’ve had your head fucked with for several months and learning that those monsters you killed were actually people is more than enough for a whole

“Heh.”

“What?”

“I just spent well over an hour sitting on the porch steps, trying to work up the courage to do this, and now it turns out it’s not gonna happen. It’s just kind of funny is all.” I took the seat next to her, waving away the bowl as she tried to offer me fruit. “You are right though. I can give him a few days at least, and honestly, having this conversation with you has got me feeling a lot better about whenever that’s going to happen. It’s nice that he has you looking out for him.”

We spent the next hour just… talking. She told me how she and Matt had met, how she’d taught him to fight, the genuine, bright, wonderful moments they’d had together. When Cyrus was away, when there wasn’t an angel breathing down their necks, when they’d sit under the stars at night telling stories of their lives before the flicker. She told me that Matt had missed me, that not even a week went by where he hadn’t been reminded of me, where he hadn’t lamented that loss to Chel.

I responded with stories of my own, tales of what Matt was like as a child, all the little memories he would’ve been too embarrassed to share but made him all the more endearing. I told her about Maria, about falling in love, about all the ways she’d been the strongest, kindest, most empathetic women I’d ever met. How with every day that passed, I grew more and more certain Maria realized I was trans long before I did, and that I wished so dearly that I could go back and share my true self with her in its entirety.

Then it happened.

When the fruit was gone and my own particular hunger began to gently prod at the back of my mind, I stood up to leave. Chel stood up with me. She stood up with me, and as I made to leave, she stopped me, wrapping her arms around me.

She hugged me.

Maybe things would work out after all.