A Cracked Star

-- August 2007 --

"Daddy, daddy, can we go to the park?" I say with a bright smile on my face. 

For once, my dad is home and not busy with whatever he's doing. I've heard from other girls at school talk about how they've gone on trips or gone out with their family. I've always been a little jealous about them, my family never does anything fun. Dad always starts getting mad whenever he sees me though. I don't understand what I did wrong. 

Though mama always tries to make it up for me by playing with me whenever she can. Mama always tries her best when she's with me, even when she looks tired.

"Not now." He says with a scowl on his face before grabbing a bottle from the cabinet. "Go play by yourself."

Seeing what he's reaching for I can feel myself start to shake lightly. Nodding my head quickly, I leave the room before he gets angry. 

Why won't daddy go anywhere with me? My friends at school always sound like they have fun with their parents. I just want to spend time with my dad but he never looks my way it seems. Always staring at me with anger, like I'm a problem he doesn't want in his life.  

-- September 2007 --

The sound of glass breaking and shouting can be heard from the other room. I try to hide as far as I can within my closet. Hoping that he doesn't find me behind my clothes. Clutching my other arm to stop the shaking.

"Get out of my way Elizabeth, I've told that thing time and time again not to leave her room." The man screams. "Do you even know why I have to change job sites so often?" 

"And whose fault do you think that is? I should have never gone back to you, I only returned because I thought we could care for our daughter together! With the cost of living being so high I can barely care for her alone!" Elizabeth yells back. "But look at you, taking everything you had for granted, buying alcohol with any bit of money you get from working a dead end job. Twisting facts with your twisted image to make you seem like a saint to your friends!" 

The man, in his anger, swings his fist at Elizabeth, "DON'T . . TALK . . BACK . . TO . . ME!" Elizabeth starts to cry as she receives each hit. "I’ve had it up to here with you thinking you can do anything useful. Unless you want to go further I suggest you shut the fuck up." 

I hear heavy footsteps that slowly get closer to my room. The door slams open to reveal the large man, with a bottle almost empty in hand. "I know you're in here runt. Come out." He says in a low voice, anger seeping from every word. 

I don't want to go out there, he'll hurt me again, leave marks on me that won't go away. It always ends this way, with mama and I being hurt. I just wanted to play with my friends, why am I not allowed to do anything. 

"COME OUT!" My father yells again. He starts tearing sheets away from my bed, throwing aside my book piles. The footsteps get closer to where I'm hiding. My body starts to shake even more as I realize what's about to happen.

The door to my closet is yanked open, allowing me to see my father standing there with disheveled hair and looking at me like I'm the biggest sinner here. "Get your ass out of there." He says, grabbing my right arm before yanking me, throwing me to the ground. "AHH" I scream as I feel my shoulder pop and start to feel like it's burning. 

"Who said you could go outside today huh? It wasn't me, so what gave you the bright idea to do it." My father says. 

"N-no one told me, f-father. I-I saw some of m-my friends h-hanging out and wanted to join." I lie, to hide the truth that mom took me out today. 

"Oh ho, so you think you can make decisions now, that you're a big girl huh?" He says, grabbing his belt from his pants. 

I try to crawl away, proving difficult as my right arm is feeling numb. Looking up, I see mama at the doorway, "I called the police, they're on the way. Don't expect to have a life after tonight. I've had enough of this. Of the abuse, the remarks you make about how I'm doing everything to keep this house afloat. I won't let you touch my baby anymore." 

"You!" Father says, before hitting mama once more, knocking her out. 

"M-mama no." I try to hurry over to mama before I feel an arm wrap around me. 

"We're leaving, don't expect any sympathy from me." Father says, hitting me as well. I feel my consciousness start to fade away. Reaching out towards mama once more before everything goes black.

~~~~~

I feel myself get thrown into a dark room, almost pitch black as the only source of light is coming from my father holding a flashlight in hand. 

"Welcome to your new home, if your mother wants to ruin my life, then let’s see how she likes it when I ruin hers." He says, before closing the door. He locks the door into place in the process before I hear his footsteps going further away from me. 

Left to myself in a room with no light, I feel around the area with my arm that can still move. After a few minutes I give up, finding a corner to curl up into, holding my arm in a way that won't cause pain. 

Laying there I try to think of reasons as to my life becoming like this. I didn't do anything to deserve this, I just wanted to live with mama and father happily. Mama, please help me. I miss you, I'm scared. Thinking of mama, I feel tears start to fall down my face, as I go to sleep, hungry and cold.