This DCverse is Maddening

“...I want to hit him!”

The hyper active blonde chirped innocently.

“Roll for an attack then…”

Albert sighed in defeat.

“Harley,” The nymph like woman scolded,” No.”

“But why??!”

She whined.

“This is like the second character you’ve made.”

“How is that relevant?! You’ve made multiple characters also!”

“Yeah,” Ivy rolled her eyes,” Because they’ve all died because of your obsession with this tavern owner.”

“I just know something’s up with him!” She declared while pointing a finger directly in the teen’s face,” He gets all weird whenever we try to do anything with him!”

“No psychoanalyzing, remember?”

“I wasn’t!”

As Albert listened to the pair bicker, he couldn’t help but sigh at it all. When he had first propositioned the idea of running a TTRPG session, everyone was very receptive to the idea. After finding a game that only required the use of an online dice roller, he had explained the rules and helped everyone make their characters.

He didn’t have anything grand planned and was just going to wing it for the moment. It was their first session and there was simply no way for them to get anywhere far enough to cause trouble. Maybe they would fight some wolves, wild pigs or just some random drunk on the street.

But because of a small slip up on his part, the eccentric blonde had latched onto the tavern owner with zealous glee. She was adamant that something was up with the NPC (Non-player character) and refused to let up on it. At first, she had somehow convinced the other two to go along with her schemes and then proceeded an IRL (In real life) half an hour interrogation as this poor man was bombarded with questions he would have no idea the answer of.

Given the long barrage of seemingly inane questions, he had further slipped up when giving different answers to previous questions. She had taken those slip ups like bait and took that chance to attack.

Gratefully in game.

What proceeded was a hard won battle as the tavern keeper stood over the unconscious bodies of his assailants. At first, he was just going to throw them in prison as a lesson that even in the land of make believe there were still consequences. That hadn’t worked out too well.

Having woke up in cells, she was now absolutely sure something was up with the owner. So together they spent a bit of time to plan, before breaking out of prison. But not before both Darnell’s and Ivy’s characters were both killed in the process. But now that’s when things started to get weird.

After seeing character’s friends perish at the hands of the guards, she swore revenge against them all and went to ground. There she miraculously found two more allies (wow what a surprise) who also had a bone to pick with the city’s upper echelons.

That was the beginning of the rebellion that would shake up the entire structure of that small city. Normally, having such a dedicated and dynamic player was a godsend for any Dungeon Master out there. They could by themselves help move along a dragging campaign and get back on track, or if there were no plans just create their own plot to follow. Of course it wouldn’t Harley if there weren’t any problems.

Despite her grand crusade against the city’s upper brass, she still considered that tavern owner important in some way. And made it her business to not only dig into his finical records but also kidnapped his loved ones in a way to get him to spill about any underworld dealings…

In simplest terms, Albert regretted that slip up and felt genuinely bad for the poor tavern keeper. So much so that he was even plotting to have the man become a major villain because of everything.

“Sorry it turned out this.” Sighed slightly, he turned to the lounging older man. While he didn’t get the feeling that Darnell minded the chaos whirlpool known as the villainesses, he still felt a bit guilty. He did allow each of them to go wild.

“It’s no worries,” The repairman shook his head with a broad nostalgic grin,” I don’t mind at all. This reminds me of those days…”

His eyes slightly glazed over with fond memories, lost entirely in his own little world in that moment. But that didn’t last long at all.

“But that’s enough of that,” He said while slapping together two meaty palms with an air of finality,” It was a good distraction but all of us do need to touch base.”

“Aw!” Harley whined loudly,” Are you sure we can’t just play for a bit longer?”

“We can play later.”

Ivy cajoled the sulking blonde, despite her being the primary cause of them not even leaving the starting town.

“You promise? You gotta pinky promise! That’s the only way to really lock in any promises!”

“Pinky promise.”

The redhead sighed with an audible roll of her eyes, but still caved in under her friend’s antics.

“What did you wanna talk about Arney?”

“I’m not going to sugarcoat it.” He said gravely, instantly dousing the festive mood from the last couple of hours with the reality of their situation. They weren’t playing in a peak living conditions. They were in a goddamned cement box a few feet underground. “Food is going to be a problem. We all knew this. And I am sorry Albert. It wouldn’t have been an issue with just you here.”

Albert was a bit taken aback to hear the man’s apology and took him a bit to fully comprehend his words. At first he just wanted to shrug and say something automatically but paused in thought.

‘Humans needs three things for survival.’

‘Food. Water. And shelter.’

‘But then what? No matter how unsociable some people could be, like me, they all still need companionship.’

Maybe the stray alley cat could’ve substituted his natural need for companionship, but that surely would’ve only lasted a few days at most. He was sure she would’ve gotten fed up with him at one point and probably scratch the shit out of him while he was asleep and unguarded.

And those daily phone calls would’ve only prolonged the inevitable.

‘Speaking of insanity… Status.’

[Albert Nelson

HP: 20/20

MP: 9/9

SAN: 38/45

LCK: 45/45

IP: 1

Skills:

- Appraise: 25%

- Art/Craft (Photography): 55%

- Disguise: 20%

- Fire Arms (Handgun): 60%

- Library Use: 60%

- Listen: 31%

- Navigate: 20%

- Occult: 35%

- Psychology: 51%

- Spot Hidden: 60%

- Stealth: 42%

Talents:

- Resourceful

- Lucky

Cthulhu Mythos: 0%]

‘What?!’

He was shocked, absolutely flummoxed at what was before him. While the small increase in Psychology wasn’t too much of a surprise given who he was sharing a bunker with that wasn’t what surprised him.

[SAN: 38/45]

No matter how many times he looked back at it, those numbers remained the same. These were the exact values that had worried him the most sense seeing them fall so easily from the moment he entered this world. Hell, it had even kept him up a time sometimes. It actually made him feel like those lovecraftian protagonists, the ones who feared falling into madness and finding themselves locked in a padded room injected with so much medication that their minds weren’t even there anymore.

Just a mere thought of such a fate sent a spike of fear up his spine.

So it wasn’t strange to say that he had those values well memorized and he was more than sure that something had changed.

‘My sanity went up by two whole points…’

It should’ve been impossible. Given how he attracted trouble like a beetle on dung, there was simply no hope in him finding somewhere to rest long enough to matter.

“It’s no problem.”

Albert blurted out after realizing that all eyes were on him. Maybe at first he would’ve been a bit pissed but after seeing how much fun he had these last couple of hours, it had given him a different perspective. Harley might’ve been annoying as hell, Ivy kinda-very weird sometimes and Darnell like a wall. The teen was sure the he wasn’t any better, but despite that the group had grown on him like moss.

‘Maybe that was the key? Find ‘friends’?’

While Marceline and her group could be considered friends, it was readily apparent that they had already gotten their group dynamics down to a science. He had felt like a bit of a fifth wheel while investigating Marian’s case…

“Now that’s out of the way,” Darnell nodded before continuing,” As I was saying, food is going to be a problem. It already was one the moment we stepped in here. Maybe it was that problem hadn’t grown to urgent but with each passing day, it has only grown.”

“I’m tired of eating rice and canned beans!” Harley whined with a glint in her eye Albert didn’t like one bit,” If I don’t get something good in me soon… I don’t know what I’ll do!”

“Agreed.” Ivy nodded,” I’m sick of canned meat and jerky. I’ll probably puke if I even see anymore of it.”

The stray cat meowed in agreement with the carnivorous woman.

“Same.”

Albert sighed. Food had been a huge problem. Some much so that he was sure that he had lost some weight and given how skinny he was already, it didn’t look on him at all. And he wasn’t the only one either. Everyone had a slightly hollow out look to their cheeks.

“That exactly why we need to scavenge.” Darnell said,” I know it’s going to be dangerous, but we don’t have a choice. The news haven’t told us when this lock down will end.”

They had listened to the radio everyday and nothing of note had been said. Only the news of the notorious mad genius, Edward Nygma, being apprehended by police late last night. But that little bit of good news sounded kind of hollow especially after all these days being locked up like animals.

“We can’t go during the day.” Ivy added,” They patrol too often then. While going at night isn’t much better, we’ll only really have to deal with desperate people. Obviously a lot better than tanks and cops who let this new power get to their heads.”

“This’ll be the only time those army rejects will get to enacted their shattered dreams after being turned down!” Harley snorted derisively before brightening back up,” Don’t worry! Red and I are super strong! No one’s gonna mess with either of you as long as we’re here! They just gotta give me a reason and I’ll show them why they call me The Lullaby!”

“No one has ever called you that.”

“Fine.”

She pouted.

“It’s good either way.” Darnell said,” Does anyone have a map?”

“Yeah I got one.”

Albert said before rummaging around in his backpack and pulling out the heavily marked map from what seemed like a life time ago.

“Thanks. Then, here’s my plan. We’ll split up in pairs. We’ll go in opposite directions for a few blocks and curve around in countering rotations. We should meet back up here in about two hours. That’ll give us enough time to scout out the area and possible find places that are lightly ransacked. If you can, try to find other shelters like this one. Take note of them and at another time, we can go there to either change locations or scavenge.”

“How are we going to decided whose going with who?” Harley asked,” How about drawing straws?”

“No.” Ivy denied instantly,” Let’s just high roll or something.”

“I’m fine either way.” Darnell shrugged,” Just make sure you girls aren’t on the same team. I’m an old man and he’s a kid. Neither of us will scare off anyone desperate.”

‘I’m not a kid..’

*********************************************************************************

“Does everyone remember the plan?”

Darnell asked, his breathe sending out a plume of fog into the air.

“Yes sir!”

Harley chirped happily while throwing up a lazy salute.

“I got it.”

Ivy said lazily.

“Yeah.”

Albert said finally, struggling to find some warmth that could be squeezed out of his heavy overcoat. Gotham has always had terrible weather. During the day it always had a slight wet feeling to the air itself. And with the turning seasons, nights were simply dreadful.

He was infinitely glad that he had bought this trench coat, and even more grateful that he also went shopping through that thrift store. Wearing multiple layers of pants and shirts had helped a lot to help with preserving heat.

But the actual denizens of this god awful city had far outstripped him in his own preparedness. The ever hyperactive blonde wore a black heavy winter coat that hung slightly off her heavily muscled shoulders, with the words ‘Bitch with an attitude’ stretched across the back. While the handyman wore a similar heavy overcoat, obviously without the logo on the back. But as for the green skinned woman…?

She took whatever precautions to the extreme. A pitched black coat with some kind of animal fur lining the inside, multiple layers of leggings and sweat pants and even more layers of shirts. She even had heavy duty gloves, earmuff and big fluffy hat.

Honestly, she looked like how his mother use to dress him when there was even a hint of the weather being cold. She dressed like someone who wanted experience snow for the first time after spending their entire life in tropical climates.

And even then, the red head let out some slight shivers ever once and awhile.

“Don’t worry Red.” Harley tried to comfort her friend,” This shouldn’t take long. Did you bring your portable heater?”

“I got it right here.”

She poked at her bulging coat.

“What about your artificial lights? Are they all charged up?”

“Yes mom.” Ivy rolled her eyes,” I’ll be fine.”

“Okay if you say so..” Then Harley turned her full attention to the youth that looked straight out of an old noir film,” You watch out for Red, you hear? She’s as tough as they come but still watch her back. She’s a bit slow when it gets cold like this..”

“Don’t call me slow.”

The red head scowled.

“I’ll keep an eye out.”

Albert agreed readily enough. Cold metal stinging like coals against his chest, weighing heavily on his shoulders like a mantle.

“Good.” She patted his cheeks slightly, before turning and giving the thoroughly bundled up woman,” You be safe, you hear?”

“You too.”

“We’ll meet back here in two hours.” Darnell nodded,” If there’s any trouble, try to to hole up somewhere and call us. Stay safe you two.”

“Okay.” Albert nodded,” You too.”

Then he turned to the side where a black alley feline was laying around lazily, her bright yellow eyes barely opened as she just took in the relative fresh air. After some thought, he reached his hand out to gentle pat at her head.

“I’ll be back.”

He said and was infinitely glad that all he got was a lazy glare and not the storm of claws. But she did eventually bat his hand away after a few seconds.

And with that, the two pairs split up from one another. Each going their own ways. Albert could still hear the blonde’s hyper active voice as she talked the poor man’s ears off.

When the two left the alley completely, he couldn’t help but take in the chaotic scenery before him. Gotham had indeed seen better days. Glass from broken store windows laid littered around everywhere in sight. Debris was everywhere. Cars smashed together, beer bottles and other trash was essentially lining the street.

He could see multiple holes that looked eerily like they were caused by bullets flying. It was only mere few days since he last saw this shitty city and somehow in that short amount of time it got worse.

“This is a dump.” Ivy said as she to scanned the area," Gotham’s shitty and all, but this…”

Albert could only agree but figured that was the effect of routine city cleaners being absent. He just hoped that things got back to normal once those inmates were back behind bars, how else was he suppose to complete cases?

The two walked in relative silence as he tried to his senses open to world around him, taking in ever stumble and crashes as the strays of the city really ran wild. But other than that, he did not hear a single human out and about. Which wasn’t really all to strange considered the time at night they had decided to venture out. Who in their right minds would be outside after midnight during a city wide lock down?

It would be safer to walk across a bed of freshly sharpened razors.

Despite that, he still couldn’t help but appreciate the beauty of the world itself. Beyond the shitty looking city, the sky itself had a lack of that natural smog. Stars twinkled gently and without pause, completely unaffected by the chaos the mortals below found themselves in. But most of all, he took in the moon. Big and beautiful.

‘Waxing Gibbous.’

“Thank you.”

Her soft words caught him momentarily off guard and completely dragged him out of his appreciations. Albert really hadn’t expected the poison mistress to start up a conversation with him, having only figured she spoke to him in the shelter because of proximity. He figured she was more of the silent type, content to lavish in comfortable silence. Like him.

“For what?”

The teen asked, having no idea where this came from.

“For not being mean to Harley,” She said coolly,” I know and love her too well not to know the effect her attitude can have on people. I’ve known her for years and I can take it pretty damn well. But whenever she meets someone new, she gets so excited that it tends to scare people off. And given….personal reasons, I think she needs as many good friends as she can get. Despite the situation, thank you for not growing too annoyed with her.”

There was a lot unsaid in that statement but Albert could read what those ‘personal reasons’ were. Ivy’s dislike-no-hatred for the Joker was a well known fact no matter which media. He knew she had despised the clown with all her might and wanted nothing more than to snatch Harley out of that incredibly abusive relationship but knew better.

The prince of crime just had his claws dug in too deep for any outside influence to permanently severe the two’s relationship. And like everyone who knows a victim, knew that the only one could make a difference is the victim themselves. They had to choose to leave. Choose to fall into the support of friends and family. To choose to heal from their ordeal.

Albert knew that Harley would eventually break free from the Joker and grow into a figure all on her own but also was aware that it would take a lot to do so. She would relapse every once and awhile like all victims would. But as she had a good support system then the blonde would recover and become stronger from it.

“She is annoying.” Albert agreed readily,” But she’s fun to be around. In small doses.”

“She’ll grow on you.”

Ivy grinned.

(A/N: I’ve had to rewrite this conversation between Ivy and Albert many times. At first I was going to have a heart to heart between the two with her thanking him for giving them a chance but then I actually sat back and realized something. She wouldn’t be that open with anyone, especially not after only a few days. And honestly such talk made it seem like she regretted her past actions. She doesn’t. She honestly never would. Poison Ivy is a bonafide Eco-extremist, who firmly believes that humanity as a whole is nothing more than a parasite on this green Earth. So instead of her giving illusion of regret, I decided to lean more heavily into her feelings for Harley. She cares heavily for her and decided to center the conversation around that. Even then, I don’t feel like I’ve really nailed how Ivy would act or speak.)