This DCverse is Maddening

“-miss my babies! They were such adorable and sweet things! I sure hope they’re feeding them correctly! I still remember the first time I met met them! I was so scared of them and they almost nipped off my fingers! But it didn’t take long for us to bond and started to look forward to my increasingly frequent visits! But it’s sad that I can’t even visit them now! Which I find-”

Albert could only nod at the blonde’s tirade as she leaned against the nearby wall, with a slightly glassy look in his eye. Harley could talk.. A lot..

This had been a pretty routine thing these last couple of days as they waited for the city above to not blow up and wipe them all off the face of the map. And apparently each occupant had their own way to pass the time.

Darnell, the handyman that actually got the teen in this shitty situation, had made it a game to see how well he could make his tools shine. There were a few things Albert found out about the man, one primarily that he had gotten use to the weirdness of the other two occupant and was pretty stoic over all. While it was evident that he cared about the two residents in some way, the young private investigator could tell it was nothing sexual or anything based on their physical aesthetics.

‘Maybe like daughters?’

He didn’t know and with the old man keeping his cards close to his chest, it was hard to actually ask without the other two also getting involved.

“-nd that’s why vanilla ice cream is the best flavor! Who cares if it’s the basic bitch option? There I said it! Sue me! It’s just the perfect base for any topping you could ever want! Sprinkles? Boom no problem! Chocolate syrup? Thank you very much! I’ve been in so many bar fights with the heathens that believe strawberry is the best! Can you believe it?! The absolute nerve of them all! And don’t even get me started on the degenerates that enjoy straight chocola-”

Harley Quinn, the overly talkative blonde psychopath with an Academically approved doctorate degree in Psychology, was turning out to be like the problem child among this group of miscreants. Not only did they have force her to take her daily hour to herself multiple times but even then she still kept breaking the peace every five to six minutes. Usually it was just nonsense with interspersed nuggets of actual tangible information that he filed away for future use. Like her childhood, life in school and college. Stuff like that but he recognized that she skirted around the time period afterwards and he knew exactly why. After first graduating and accepting a position at Arkham Asylum, she met the man that would turn her entire world upside down and twist the woman into a grisly mirror image of herself. And he knew that it was far too early in the timeline for her to have broken away from the man.

But other than that, the blonde didn’t seem to have any..peaceful hobbies. He hadn’t seen her pick up a pencil, draw a picture, write anything, read or anything! She just seemed more physical inclined and he caught her many times subconsciously prepare to do some kind of gymnast stretching routine only to stop midway as she thought better of it. Exercise did require food and given her frame, a lot of it. And Albert didn’t think a diet of rice, canned food and beans was really satisfying anyone.

“-nda miss steak. Hey Red how about after all this is done we go out and get a big, fat steak? Like a real monster! Seventy-two ounce kind of thing! I bet we could back like two of those no problem! And bacon! Oh yeah that’ll just hit the spot! Crispy and savory! And maybe drizzle it all in some kind of chicken based sauce? My mouth is watering just thinking about it!”

Pamela Isley, or better known as Poison Ivy, was like a breath of fresh air in comparison to her hyper active friend. She just spent a majority of her time reading either environmental or chemistry magazines or books and usually keeps to herself. And unlike how much he struggled to deal with the blonde, it was like this situation didn’t bother her in the slightest. More like it was business as usual. If there were a few things that did bother him, it was probably the fact that the green skinned red head went through long periods of time in which she didn’t even flinch. Like some kind of jade statue. At first, he just assumed she had fallen asleep or something, but nope. She just zoned out in a kinda creepy way and judging from how neither of his other shelter mates reacted, he assumed it was just something she did..

While the poison mistress didn’t seem to mind the blonde’s antics, even she grew weary sometimes and regularly took her time of isolation without a fuss. And overall, she just seemed content to languish around doing nothing at all. The polar opposite of Harley. But even he could tell she was beginning to grow restless. Maybe it was being stuck in a cement box for a few days already, maybe it was limited supply of meat. Or some kind of combination of the two. It was like they had caged a predator and just watched as it prowled around the enclosure just waiting for the time to finally stretch it’s limbs to strike.

But despite that, at least she made it her business not to bother the youth too much. Only taking some time out of her day to fervently teach the teen about some environmental issues that his generation would be dealing with in the near future. And other than their tense first conversation where she asked him about his opinion on the world as a whole, the red head just seemed content to let the hours pass. Nothing like Albert expected, he was sure that he would actually like the woman if he wasn’t aware of the atrocities she had committed in the name of preserving nature.

Who could imagine this relaxing woman was a well known eco-terrorist responsible for a whole lot of death.

“Harley.”

The red head said simply.

“Fine.” Harley pouted slightly,” No more food talk.”

At least that was one thing in her favor, she knew how to handle the chatterbox with a practiced hand. And apparently the blonde knew when to not cross the line, food being that line. He had noticed how she hadn’t touched even a single grain of rice or beans and strictly ate canned meat.

And as for the black cat? That was both simpler and more complicated than he wished to explain. She usually spent her days similarly to Poison Ivy, and just languished away in her spot overlooking them all. Like some kind of ruler watching over her subjects. Sometimes she would come to prowl around the room ignoring anyone that tried to engaged with her before completing a lap or two before leaping back into place. Other than the meals he shared with the cat, she didn’t even spare him a single glance or attention in the slightest.

Judging from her frequent naps, she too had some resistance to the blonde’s high pitch voice and usually ignored the woman harder than she did him.

“-he fishes were something I couldn’t ever imagined! These giant sharks that just swam through the water like torpedoes and colossal orcas that practically flew out from the surface! I even got kissed by one! At first I thought it was going to take a nibble out of little old me! I’ve heard there’s been plenty of accidents with them too! About them attacking tourist and trainers alike! But this one just gave me a giant smooch before splashing me with some icy cold water! Can’t say it was any worse than any of my other dates! Talking about dates, let me tell you about this time this guy tried to chat me up-”

If there was one thing more frustrating than the constant barrage of idle chatter, it was the fact Albert had absolutely nothing to do. He only had his backpack full of clothes, high quality paper and a half used make-up kit. While he could maybe practice, the teen didn’t want to give the blonde anymore ammunition but judging from how mind numbing meditating had become it didn’t seem like he would have much of a choice soon enough. Sure he sometimes engaged with his shelter mates occasionally, but he found out quickly that his introverted tendencies followed him to this world with a vengeance. And it seems he had even less of a tolerance to people than he thought.

While he did try to keep in contact with Marceline and the rest of the crew with daily phone calls, after spending nearly eighteen hours ago listening to someone’s voice he just couldn’t stomach the idea of actually talking to anyone and usually just sent some texts to the collective group chat.

But if there was one thing he achieved during this time, it was the ability to actively sense his own providence as it swirled around him. The sensation of grains caressing his skin and tickling at his hair was just an eye blink away. At first he thought he could spend hours just watching that film flow lazily across his existence but honestly it got old after an hour.

At least watching his LCK recovery in action was somewhat entertaining. His previous observations of these grains becoming sluggish had been proven accurate to say the least. He had even sacrificed an entire night of sleep just to witness the phenomena, and he wasn’t disappointed. He didn’t know exactly when it happened but the stream at one point seem to expand out further into the world. Becoming more and more ethereal as it expanded in volume like the tide coming in on shore. During this time, that feeling of security the film granted him seem to momentarily weaken causing his heart to nearly pause. Sweat began to form on his brow as the feeling of his existence becoming thinner in that moment, before like the ocean, the tide came crashing in.

That film retracted further back into place, colliding and crashing with one another as the grains ran rampant across his skin. The stream flew quickly and simply devoured the space left behind. It seemed a lot more energetic as it tried to find it’s own equilibrium, struggling and coming into conflict with their brethren as they all churn in a type of chaotic unison. As time went on, the stream slowly became less vicious and fell deeper into a sort of normalcy, becoming seemingly thicker than it initially was. Even then, he could still notice some sluggish grains being carried along by the current.

[LCK: 35/45]

And judging from his LCK at the time, it apparently wasn’t done recovering fully just yet. That was nearly two days ago and by then his film of protection was in full functionality. A fat lot of use it was though. Other than the apparent passive use it had, he still hadn’t even begun to touch upon Infunda Fortuna. Or Infuse Fortune in the present tongue. And it wasn’t like he could whip out another sheet of high quality paper that’ll quickly burn up within the day just to get some kind of reference point to start from. The technique itself already worked on fundamentals he didn’t fully understand and that the author deemed the information common knowledge. Just because he could now sense his fortune, it didn’t mean he had any talent in actually manipulating in the ways the texts told.

Even slightly nudging the grains into place was an act of futility and the diagrams needed for the technique to actually work was far out of his league. It really didn’t help any that he could reread the text without exposing himself.

“-so boooreddd!”

Harley whined petulantly. Walking precariously on only her hands as she balanced effortlessly. Her blonde locks dragged along the ground as she did a few laps around the room, shoulder muscles bulging with every handstep(?). Frankly it was a pure display of both athleticism and control, making everyone there shoot the blonde enviable glances.

“Same.” Ivy agreed readily enough with a sigh, closing her book with an audible thump. Albert was sure that she had already read that particular book multiple times, it didn’t matter if it was her favorite novel or not, rereading the same thing over and over again would turn anyone mad. Especially if cooped up for a long period of time. Like they were for instance.

Darnell only grunted in a form of acknowledgment before going back to his task, cleaning those damn tools for the umpteenth time so far.

Albert knew one thing for certain, if they couldn’t find some way to pass the time, a trip to Arkham Asylum seem like something in their future. Maybe that was the problem with more modern living? Maybe their minds have gotten spoiled with the constant flow of stimuli in the form of television and spending simply losing hours at a time to the relentless attack of light and sound that human interpreted as speech. Hell not even the radio and it’s routine updates could keep their minds occupied for long.

He couldn’t help but gulp as his eyes glanced across the iconic bat being propped up in the far corner. Knowing that judging from his own knowledge of the blonde, it wouldn’t be long before she starts swinging that thing to get some kind of stimulation. And he didn’t even want to think what the poison mistress would start doing to alleviate her own boredom. The old man might be fine but the teen was an outsider, having no rapport with the two that would stop them from seeing him as just another poor schmuck that was in the wrong place at the wrong time.

“Have you guys ever played any tabletop games?”

Albert asked, getting the bright idea to try to get these crazy people to turn there more violent tendencies in something imaginary. Plus besides, these types of games were the be all, end all solution to boredom even a worlds away.

“You mean the ones for nerds?”

The blonde asked cheerily.

“Harley.” Ivy replied steadily,” We’re both the literal definition of nerds.”

She only got a raspberry in reply as the woman kept on with her circus act. But it seems that what the teen had said did attract some interest out of those bored green eyes.

“I haven’t played one of those since high-school,” The red head sighed as nostalgia tinged her voice,” Those were the days..”

“’Those days’ weren’t even a decade ago!” Harley snorted,” You’re barely older than I am! Stop acting like your ancient!”

“But yes, I’ve played a few tabletops.” Ivy ignored the blonde’s squawking,” But it’s been years so I don’t know the more popular ones nowadays.”

“I’ve also played a few,” Albert half lied through his teeth, having only really played two different TTRPG’s in his life. One being the oh so popular Dungeons and Dragons, and the other being Call of Cthulhu of course. His general group just didn’t find any other system interesting despite his growing interest to take off into that pile of discovery. Who knew, he could’ve found some systems that would’ve acted as catalyst for him to spend a couple hundred dollars of accessories he would never use. “But I can probably look some up that don’t require much prep work or materials, do you have preference?”

“Not really-”

“That’s a lie!” Harley interjected, either outright ignoring the green skinned woman’s glare or oblivious to it,” She’s absolutely obsessed with fantasy! Particularly high fantasy! Wizards, knights, and monsters! The whole works!”

“Gee thanks Harley…”

“No problem! You know I got your back Red!”

“But seriously,” She turned back to the youth,” Anything sounds better than sitting here doing nothing, you can pick a genre and I’ll go along with it.”

“How about we take turns?”

Albert decided it was better to give everyone a say less there be some hostility to build upon. Already knowing that every good gaming session started with communication on all parts, as Keeper he had to think of all his players first. And making sure everyone is heard is the most basic requirement.

“That sounds fine with me.”

Ivy nodded in agreement. Her red locks bouncing in kind as she relaxed back against the wall. And judging from the blonde who smiling widely at the teen, he must’ve achieved something grand.

“What about you Arney?” She asked chipperly,” You ever go down the nerdy path of dice and paper?”

“Yes.” Darnell grunted, still reverently shining his tools,” When I was first deployed, there wasn’t a lot to do back then. Not like now anyway. One of my buddies, had a history with them and always carried dice with him. And when things got some boring that we started doing dumb shit, he got us to play. I remember it being fun and it kept us out of trouble with our sergeant, which was also good.”

“Did you keep playing after?”

“No.” He shook his head,” After I got back from overseas, we all had our own lives to live. Or at least try to live. We did try to keep in contact but not all of us were suited for civilian life. It was a different time so we didn’t have all the resources that are readily available now a days. Last I heard, one of them is up north somewhere. Got himself some land and secluded himself. Lucky bastard.”

“You swore!” She gasped,” You gotta add a dollar to the swear jar!”

The old man only chuckled slightly in answer.

Honestly, it was a sight to see how expertly the blonde could maneuver through that landmine of a conversation while being so ridiculous while doing so. She had picked up on the man’s darkening mood as memories of all his lost buddies were brought to the forefront of his mind before it got any worse. It wasn’t hard to read between the lines from the man’s story.

That friend up north was probably one of the last survivors.

It was a sobering fact, something made him dread living for such a long time. To witness the world change and all his friends die out one by one as they were consumed by demons that latched onto them during their darkest days.

With that on his mind, he scrolled through the web for some kind of free TTTRPG (Table Top Role Playing Game) that was both generic enough to use in any genre but also simple enough that they could all play without a lot of prep-time. But most all, it had to be as cheap as could be. Preferably free. It didn’t matter how complex or deep the system was, if it cost wasn’t at the low low price of zero then he wasn’t going to get it.

As he passed by a variety of different systems, not even the rumbling from overhead could distract with then. But judging from the sudden sqwuak and thump, it must’ve disrupted the blonde’s balance.

“Geez!” She cursed,” What’s the big idea?! Isn’t that like the third one today?! How many do you need for one city?!”

“Apparently it’s getting worse.” Ivy replied, gazing up at the ceiling as the military machinery rumbled overhead. They had gotten use to the routine patrols from above but recently the interval between each one was growing shorter and shorter. It was rather worrying that they could now hear three different sets of tanks going about the streets overhead. Something must’ve happened that caused them to start tightening up their routines.

“Do you think Bats is out there?”

Harley asked.

“Is the sky blue?” Ivy snorted,” I would be more concerned if he wasn’t. You know him, he’s already all over this.”

“Then hurry up Bats!” She shouted up at the ceiling,” I’m too pretty to die in a cement box!”

“You’re not dying.”

The red head rolled her eyes. If there was one thing Albert learned it was that Harley was certainly a drama queen of the highest order.

“Of boredom!” She whined, now rolling on the ground and looking more like some kind of child throwing a temper tantrum than a grown ass woman,” I can’t wait to get out of here! I miss TV soooo much! If I get anymore bored then I might just starting swinging around my baby!”

(A/N: Hello everyone! This chapter was my attempt at slipping in little slice of life moments into the story, as you can see this novel won't only have mystery and action. There will be times, like these, where everyone just takes a step back a prepare themselves for the future. I did try to emmulate the kind of relationship Ivy and Harley has. Didn't I tell you that I made her annoying? XD I tried to really show how polar opposites they truly are and how that kind of dynamic would work. I don't know about you, but on the surface, Ivy seems alot more responsible and down to earth than Harley. Like an anchor for a free spirit. I also tried to sprinkle in relevant information and clues that'll be important in the future. With that said, I hope guys enjoyed the chapter and I'll see you all next week!)