Bad Life

Some reporters standing at the edge looked at me with puzzled expressions. I averted their gazes and strode into the banquet hall.
The music was so loud it pounded against my chest. Flustered, I didn’t bother to look around and just kept walking, only to be startled by a flash going off right beside me. The camera was pointing not at me but at the items displayed in the hall. Only then did I finally take in my surroundings. The guests, lost in the party, seemed uninterested in anything beyond champagne and cigarettes. My mind settled. Relying on the occasional burst of laser light, I began to inspect the hall more carefully.
Tall display cases were arranged throughout the hall, each showcasing handbags or shoes. Whenever someone struck a pose in front of a case, the photographers would fire bright flashes to capture their photo. But in the vast space of the banquet hall, that was only a small fraction of what was happening. Stylishly dressed people held champagne flutes, smiling and chatting, lightly dancing to the music as they enjoyed themselves. It was the exact opposite of the society party at the Mulsbi Mansion, but this noisy, complex atmosphere felt more comfortable to me.
I grabbed a glass of champagne and wove through the crowd, going over my plan. The first thing I had to do was find Simon (시몬, Simon). While I held Simon, Jerome would make contact with Timothy at the . I had no intention of following Jerome’s plan willingly, but I certainly intended to meet Simon. He had to be somewhere in this party. Meeting Jerome had been unexpected, but Simon was different. I had time to prepare. When I saw Simon… I cut through the crowd recklessly, then came to a sudden stop.
I stood still for a moment, staring at him, and he sensed my gaze and turned to look at me.
Between him and me were several people. Over the tops of their heads, I saw a face just as I had seen it countless times in the media over the past eight years. The distant pounding of the music reverberated in my head again. I opened my mouth and called his name.
“Simon.”
Simon looked at me as if I were a stranger, then turned his head away. He went back to focusing on the person who had struck up a conversation with him. It felt like a blow to the back of my head. I closed my eyes tightly, then opened them and looked at him again. It was him—no one else. Simon was ignoring me.
My stomach burned. I had only had champagne, but it felt as if I’d chugged vodka straight from the bottle. I staggered and gripped a nearby table. The table wobbled, and the bottles and glasses piled on it clinked together in a loud crash. Everyone else glanced at me, but Simon did not look back. I watched his profile as he continued talking, then exhaled slowly.
Simon’s dismissive turn caught me completely off guard. The memory of his tearful embrace haunted me, and his cold indifference felt like a dream. There was a plan… Jerome and I had a plan. I had to grab Simon and force him to look at me… I had to… Just as I steadied myself, a sudden tug on my arm nearly knocked me off balance again.
Just before I could fall, a firm hand supported me. Before I could see whose face it was, I was # Nоvеlight # hauled into the crowd by a powerful grip. I turned to look at Simon in a hurry—and at that moment our eyes met. His gaze remained indifferent and cold. Startled by the unfamiliar warmth, I looked away first.
I followed the hand that guided me firmly for a few steps before regaining my senses and coming to a halt. I grabbed the hand that held my arm and twisted it sharply. The man who had been leading the way turned around with a frown. His face was extremely familiar, yet seeing him here was so unexpected it felt strange. After the surprise of Simon, this second twist left me speechless.
“Hey, you thug, stop just grabbing people out of nowhere! You almost hurt me!”
Teddy (테디, Teddy) grumbled angrily, rubbing his twisted wrist. I couldn’t believe it and stared at him in astonishment. I reached out and touched my face, grabbed my nose to make sure. Teddy flared his nostrils so forcefully I half expected him to sneeze. He looked me up and down, then flicked his nostrils again in contempt.
“Why are you dressed like some piss-stained street kid? And still drinking like a lush—haven’t you quit yet?”
Teddy sneered with all his might and took a step closer. I was too shocked to speak, my mouth opening and closing silently. He narrowed his eyes and examined my face, then from head to toe again, even grabbing my cheek and turning my head left and right before speaking brusquely.
“You ran away, lived off me, and now your face is half gone? Serves you right, you idiot.”
“……”
“You ungrateful bastard. You’re worse than a six-penny tramp….”
I stared at Teddy standing that close, then wrapped my arms around his cheek and kissed him. To reach his lips—he was almost a head shorter than me—I had to bend my head down. I gripped his jaw and nape tightly, pressing my lips firmly against his. Teddy, momentarily stunned, struggled in my arms. He groped at my hair and tried to push me away. But I clung to him, licking and sucking his lips. Just as I thought he might give in, he bit my lip hard. I looked up at him, and while our lips parted, Teddy hurriedly whispered.
“Are you nuts? Everyone’s staring at us!”
I understood the words but pretended not to, simply gazing at his face. His visage flushed from eyes to cheeks, even his nose, turning him adorably red.
“Follow me.”
Teddy finally whispered hoarsely. Smiling, we wove through the onlookers who watched us with curious glances and slipped away. Teddy guided me gently by the hand as we crossed the banquet hall. When I had been alone, the hall had felt dizzying and chaotic, but Teddy navigated it with ease. In no time, we exited the hall and entered a back corridor used by the staff. Parting the busy servants, Teddy flung open a plain door painted black.
A musty smell of clothes hit my nose—it looked like a changing room. As soon as he shut the door, Teddy grabbed my tie and kissed me. He thrust his tongue against my lips and explored my mouth roughly. His lips were soft, warm, and sweet. I laughed as I bit and sucked his lips, charmed by his sudden roughness.
When our lips parted, I hugged him tightly. I wrapped my arms around his neck and squeezed hard. His firm body smelled so familiar. Teddy stayed still in my arms, then suddenly stomped on my foot. I laughed like an idiot. I hugged him even tighter, and finally Teddy returned the embrace.

I buried my face in his shoulder, savoring his warmth long enough, then pulled back by his nape. His face was still flushed. I narrowed my eyes and glared at him. Putting aside the heartfelt reunion, I demanded,
“What are you doing all the way in London?”
Teddy’s expression shifted immediately, and he shot back sarcastically,
“And what about you? What the hell are you doing here?”
“I asked first.”
“I told you I came to make money, idiot.”
“What about the strip club? Who got you this job?”
“You left without a word before, and now you pretend to care?”
I peered at Teddy with doubt, ready to press him further.
“Why would you come to work at a high-class party like this? You’re not exactly short of money.”
“Why wouldn’t I be short? Do you think feeding you cost nothing?”
“For crying out loud. Just from the tips you skimmed off the dancers at the club, you could buy a house….”
“Hey, I just brokered deals and got paid fair and square! Don’t call it skimming!”
“Fair and square, my ass. Why are you so greedy for money? You’d rather rip people off than go hungry?”
“Ripping people off? Who’s ripping off whom? And who are you to talk, you jerk?”
I was about to retort when I noticed tears glistening in Teddy’s eyes. Frozen, I stared at him speechlessly. He glared at me, tears welling, and growled,
“What gives you the right to meddle? Why are you involving yourself in what I do now?”
“Teddy….”
“You only have that to say? You came all this way to find me, and this is it….”
He sank against the locker, head bowed, muttering,
“…after I took care of you.”
“What?”
“…one day you just stormed in, went on a rampage, and I fed you, sheltered you, fucking lived with you…”
Teddy buried his face in his knees and shouted. I watched his trembling shoulders in silence.
“You didn’t say a word! Just like that, suddenly!”
His voice quivered with tears. I stood frozen, unable to reply, just watching him. His small frame shook with sobs; I reached out to comfort him, then stopped. Comforting him wouldn’t be hard. But what came next? Should I apologize for leaving without a word and promise to go back with him now? I couldn’t. I had to get back to Simon right away. Even if Jerome’s plan succeeded and I escaped this mansion, I could not return to Teddy. I would leave him again for the same reason I left before.
Lost in thought, I felt Teddy’s fingers touch my ankle. He remained with his face buried in his knees, reaching out only to gently grasp my ankle. Instinctively, I stepped forward. Teddy flung his arms around my legs and buried his face. I had no choice but to sit down in front of him. I hugged him back as he burrowed into my embrace. He reminded me of the time when I, drunk on drugs, collapsed into his arms—and I held him now as he sobbed. Still, I couldn’t utter a single comforting word.
After a long while, Teddy emerged from my arms with puffy eyes. Embarrassed, he turned his back and wiped his face on his sleeve. I looked at the redness at his earlobes and nape, then wrapped him in another hug from behind. He tried to shake me off but subtly leaned back on me. In a voice hoarse from crying, he muttered,
“You owe me, you know.”
My throat tightened. I wanted to reply but feared that any words would sound like a promise. Surprisingly, Teddy didn’t press me for an answer. We remained silent, leaning on each other. Finally, Teddy, now calm, pulled out a cigarette to smoke, and I managed to ask,
“But what did you mean when you said you came all this way to find me?”
“What do you mean….”
Teddy, about to light his cigarette, paused awkwardly. Flustered, he coughed and confessed.
“You vanished suddenly, and that Christine or whatever pulled me aside, asking where you went. I… I really wondered what had happened to you….”
My heart ached and I stroked Teddy gently. He brushed my hand away and continued.
“And a few weeks ago someone came to Moulin Rouge looking for you. He had your photo and said your name was Rachel.”
“Who?”
“I don’t know. Anyway, all the dancers and staff knew you lived with me.”
“And?”
“And? We told him your name wasn’t Rachel but Raymond, that you weren’t a dancer but just a freeloader living off us. So he asked me if you were my parasite.”
I stared at Teddy, speechless. He leisurely smoked his cigarette and went on.
“He was prying—asking where you went, where your family was, your friends, even your last name… But how the hell would I know? Our house parasite had run away long ago, and I said I’d been looking for you. Then… ahem.”
Suddenly he stopped talking and cleared his throat. Just as I was about to press him, Teddy murmured quietly,
“He asked if we were… close. And then, well… he left that day. But about a week ago, or maybe a bit longer, he came back looking for you.”
I couldn’t hold back and asked,
“Who is he? What does he look like? What’s his name? Why was he looking for me?”
“Oh? He looked ordinary. His name was something like Smith. He still thought you were a dancer. He said he wanted to hire you at his party.”
“So? Tell me more.”
“There’s nothing more. He said since you’re working as a waiter here, there’s a spot open if you’re interested. That was it.”
“……”
“And he was paying well too. Some kind of non-disclosure clause… um, something like that.”
“Non-disclosure clause?”
“……”
“What does that mean?”
“Anyway! What are you doing here? You’re not dressed like staff….”
I felt a bad premonition from Teddy’s evasiveness. Grabbing his shoulder menacingly, I demanded,
“What’s this non-disclosure clause?”
“It’s just… at big parties like this, they do that, right? They don’t want celebrities going out and blabbing about it.”
They put a non-disclosure clause in the contract just because a few celebrities were here? Clearly someone had used me to lure Teddy in. It had to be Timothy. He must have done a background check on me! Why hadn’t I thought of that? Christopher’s lies must have been exposed by now. But what was their plan in bringing Teddy here? He was just an ordinary waiter, nothing suspicious. As I let my mind wander, a thought suddenly struck me. Jamie. He’d been a regular guest at the party before being dragged to the and suffering the same fate. If they intended to use Teddy the same way—inviting him under the pretense of a job because they couldn’t justify inviting him to a party…